Quit Smoking, Dump Your Friends!
That’s the vast majority of the advice out there on the topic of your social connections after you quit smoking.
I am so glad my opinion is the opposite of those and even more glad you’re reading this.
Because you either want to be with your friends because they are good friends, so smoking has no relevance, or you just find in their company a good opportunity to smoke, so the problem is the smoking itself, not the friends.
Therefore, what you need to deal with is the smoking itself, not the social setting.
“I’m good unless I am with my friends!!! I am NOT about to not see my friends.“
If you think like this, you may also have been told:
“I was same way but finally told my crazy friends I was not having a drink with them for a couple of weeks”.
And what about friends that you’ve been smoking with for years? Smoking, drinking, celebrating, playing, working? Whatever and whenever you did together, the cigarettes were there with you.
Can you possibly avoid those friends? Should you?
You’ve also been probably advised: “You’ll have to change some things for a couple of weeks, then be with your friends again”, or even “Stop seeing friends… first 3 days are the hardest”.
The truth is, a true friend will try to protect you and respect your quit, if they’re still smoking. Won’t offer you cigarettes, will refrain from smoking in front of you, things like that.
But if you can quit like I did, you won’t even care how many people are smoking around you. You’d be a non smoker!
To me, it was helpful to finally see how smoking is connected with itself alone. Every other “connection” is not real, we just belive it is. Like with partying, relaxing, having coffee, working, fishing, gardening, being stressed, being tired, or disappointed.
When I quit, on december 16th (2008), I went straight to my almost-every-evening drinking friend, as usually. Had the talk and drink, had him rather not believing when I told him I just quit so no thanks, when he offered me a cigarette, thinking I don’t have mine.
Same the days and weeks that followed. The ONLY thing that differed was that I was not smoking. Until few months later, when something else started to differ: I stopped drinking for good. But that was my choice, you don’t have to.
Friends are friends, food is food, sex is sex, work is work… Life is life.
Smoking doesn’t have anything to do with them, but we came to belive it does, because we started by smoking once in a while, then we did it more and more often, as a result of addiction. That’s how addiction works, you never get enough.
Do YOU belive you are addicted to nicotine? Tell me in the comment section below this.
I’m asking because I didn’t belive I was, I didn’t even think of the possibility of being addicted. Not even when a friend told me that she found out that nicotine can produce addiction.
I thought to myself “Oh, poor them, the addicted ones, good on me I am not one of them, I just smoke for pleasure”. Yet I did question my senses, a lot, about how could it be possible for me to feel pleasure by doing something un-natural, against the way a living creature should work.
Understanding the addiction explained pretty much everything I was going through, so I could set myself free. Do your research and find out how and why smoking influences every aspect of our life. It will come just naturally that the only way out will be to cut it off. Clean cut.